by Searles O'Dubhain

Searles O'Dubhain (1950–2016) was one of the most prolific voices on alt.religion.druid, the Usenet newsgroup that served as the central online gathering place for Druids, Celtic pagans, and reconstructionists from the early 1990s through the 2000s. He founded the Summerlands, one of the earliest and most respected Celtic pagan web archives, and taught online Celtic Workshops for many years. This post, written at the summer solstice of 2003, is a characteristic example of his style: philosophical, mythologically grounded, and personally urgent. He moves from the paradoxes of physical life — where winning implies losing, excellence implies decay — to the specifically Druidic response to those paradoxes: becoming "the solution within the problem," seeking both knowledge and its opposite, inspiration and release. He closes with a series of riddles in the traditional Celtic kenning style, inviting the reader into the contemplation rather than providing answers.

I awoke today to the understanding that the physical world and life have certain functions. Among these are surviving, competition, feeding, being born, living and dying. Our bodies are uniquely suited for these activities. To survive as a physical being we must make use of physical abilities that are aided by mental activities. For many millions (if not billions) of years, physical survival has primarily been served by sensory inputs, motor and/or cellular responses, and adaptation to the surrounding environment. If the goal of life is to continue efficiently, then an optimization of these factors and abilities is clearly required. The best of the physical life and world appear to be all about winning by being the best in form, function and ability. Within these qualities and factors are the seeds of our undoing however.

The physical world has its seeds in an undoing of form. This occurs through aging, decay, destruction and a lack of unity/organization. The success of life brings with it needs (such as eating and reproducing) and the accompanying reactions to those needs (like hunger and overpopulation). Functions are defined by their boundary conditions, their relationships, their continuity (or points of discontinuity) and their limits. These definitions of a function's existence prevent it from achieving eventual success in an unlimited universe as they succeed in reaching those limits. The existing of order negates the existence of chaos and vice versa. That which defines them also undoes them. Excellence in ability carries with it the understanding that everything has a price associated with it. Winning implies losing. Being better implies worse. Positive gives birth to negative. Balance gives rise to imbalance (or even worse stagnation). At the extremes, goodness implies evil; gods balance not-or-anti-gods; communion implies the possibility of isolation. The wise of mind, body and spirit have seen and experienced these short comings of physical reality throughout time and the realization of purpose and being.

The heights of these realizations among humans have been called philosophies by some and religions by others. Within human society, these factors attempt to shape and define cultures through the capturing of hearts, minds and spirits and the focus of their associated energies according to some perceived central will or eternal unifying truth. Philosophy attempts to explain perception and truth while religion attempts to give order or unify truth into clearly recognizable forms, codes and laws. How well these pursuits succeed in these undertakings is sometimes thought to be a measure of their worth among humans (i.e. their nobility; their goodness; even their own truth). Even among these so-called higher pursuits exists the seeds of their undoing. Perhaps we could be clever and identify these seeds or better yet, we could become wise by identifying what these seeds are with physical worlds of form, function and concept. It is my belief that to be Druids or to be worthy of being called a Druid that we must make that effort; that we must become the solution within the problem; we must seek out knowledge, perception and inspiration, as well as embracing their counterparts which are unknowing, nonexistence and release.

This is a beginning IMO that contains its own ending, yet it is an activity that should be undertaken anyway. In doing so, a Druid could be considered to be like Cú Chulainn who embraced his death through living a life that was short yet brilliant; a veritable fire and explosion of physical activity and excellence. He was overcome by his geasa in the end, yet his beginning was itself a violation of taboos. His greatest victories were the stuff of legend, tragedy and irony. It is my hope that Draíocht, Druidry and Druidism will fare better than its heroes in its efforts to bring unity to the three worlds of form, function and understanding. Will we be wise in this ongoing effort? Will senses bring us information and awareness or will they give us pain instead? Will thought produce truth or folly? Will the flows of spirit create life or destroy its possibility?

Why would a world in need of saving, destroy its savior (if that is indeed the case)?

Why should those that are alive reject the illusions of existence that are created by sensation (killing the Buddha along the way)?

Why would a hero reject the affections of the Battle Goddess (violating his geasa and sealing his doom)?

What (or who) is very large; very small; very bright; very hard; a fire of anger; a fire of eloquence; an overwhelming knowledge; a source of endless prosperity, and a double edged understanding?

From where do they come?

What have they learned and what do they do?

What is their tradition and where is their pathway?

What do they know and who do they understand?

Is it a name, a quality, all of these, none of these or something else entirely?

I wonder.

Ponderings during the time of the Sun's Standing.

Reflections of one thing like another.

The Depths and the Heights as well as the Middle.

Colophon

Written by Searles O'Dubhain and posted to alt.religion.druid on 23 June 2003, at the summer solstice. Original Message-ID: <[email protected]>

Searles O'Dubhain (1950–2016) was the founder of the Summerlands Celtic pagan archive and a long-time teacher of Celtic traditions and Druidry online. He was among the most influential voices in the early online Druid community.

Preserved from the Usenet archive for the Good Work Library by the New Tianmu Anglican Church, 2026.

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